Sharknado 5: Global Swarming

Is it a shark?  Is it a tornado? Nope, it’s something even better….

Tonight on SyFy is the annual premiere of the next Sharknado installment:  Global Swarming.  This time, Fin and the gang find themselves traveling the globe and battling the only phenomenon that would make being a weatherman halfway interesting.

Possibly one of the most popular and successful spoof sagas, the Sharknado films have featured all kinds of creative talent and cultural commentary…all amid flying sharks, and Tara Reid.  They are storms of deliberate silliness and absurdity that, in the essence of Ed Wood, can be thought of good-bad films.

To appreciate quality cinema, you have to know what bad cinema is.  A balanced exposure to all approaches to film-making is important to a critic’s objective analysis;  it allows them to have a better informed angle when investigating what works and what doesn’t with any respective film.

Every film has something to offer, no matter how atrocious the acting is or how ludicrous the plot.  From heralded masterpieces like The Godfather to the depths of the SyFy originals, we must remember that art, even “bad art”, is art nonetheless.

Yes, I just argued that it is actually beneficial for us to watch the ‘Nadoes.  I deem it worth the while to humor these films and their humor, as they test our entertainment/cultural knowledge while allowing us to have fun and watch completely asinine happenings.  Which brings us to the next important point of concern:  what type of weapon will Tara Reid have fastened on her severed hand this time?  We will find out soon!

 

6 thoughts on “Sharknado 5: Global Swarming”

  1. Nado 5 did not disappoint! It was thoroughly confusing at many points and truly showed what loving distinctional parents will do to find there Child in a Swarming Nado for Days flying around the Globe without Food or Water lol,, thank God for his Shark Fin Helmet Lol! Tara Reid also never disappoints with her monotone painful faced Screams and her new Monster High Doll Apparel Lol! Aside from the countless cameos the Series would not be complete without Ian Zerings B Movie performance,, he’s Truly the BEST man for the Role! Wonder what the next induction will bring him and Tara’s Head and Grown Son Dolph will bring!? I will certainly be front and center for it!

    • Haha! This was my favorite part of the film: *Tara Reid screams* Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
      *5 minutes later*
      …”ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!”
      Seriously, now, was it due to her solar battery body that she was able to scream that horribly, and for that long?

      I also have theorized that the sharks in the mega-nado felt sorry for Gill and tried to rescue him, for even they could see how messed up a person would be with Fin & April for parents! The kid probably faced an existential crisis every single day of his life!
      The film was indeed confusing at many, many points, and might even stand as the most *complex* ‘Nado yet! Did we ever find out why Egypt was the answer?
      Yes yes, many questions have arisen, but I have faith that more resolutions, revelations, AND revolutions (of sharks) await us next year!

      • Lol!!!!!!!!!! Uh Ya Egypt!?!? There was ABSOLUTELY no rhyme or reason to that whole scene Lol! I’m still scratching my head! Haha! CPS needs to be called on Fins parents,, but I don’t think A Robot Head can get in much trouble lol,,, we will DEFINITELY have a front row seat for the next installment!

        • Hahaha poor Tara Reid…she never did have a good head on her shoulders!
          And LOL CPS!! Is the hero of the world even immune to social workers? Well Ian, when your kid gets sucked into a Nasty Nado for years upon years, answer is no!

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